Meet Doug Dvorak

Laugh Tracks

Price: $19.95 US

Title: Mega Motivation with a Twist? – Video or DVD

By: Dr. Earnest Carpediem™

Description:

60 minute live presentation of Doug Dvorak portraying Dr. Earnest Carpediem™. Dr. Earnest Carpediem™ delivers a highly energetic, creative and humorous interactive presentation as a motivational speaker and gifted psychic.

Price: $10 US

Title: 101 Severely Twisted Mantras – For The New Age™

By: Dr. Earnest Carpediem™

Description:

This is a compilation of 101 humorous, wacky, ridiculous remarks compiled by Dr. Earnest Carpediem™ and Professor Scientifico to help their students combat boredom and achieve enlightenment in the new age. Used in concert with Dr. Carpediem’s Motivational and Twisted Mantras you can surely achieve a new level of spirituality. The concepts and suggested activities in this book are strictly for contemplation and are not meant to be taken internally.

Examples:

#1

#1 I hope and pray life isn’t one big joke, because I don’t get it.

#11

#11 “Once the game is over, the king and the pawn go back in the same box”

#21

#21 Alcohol–the cause of and answer to all of life’s problems! – Homer Simpson

#31

#31 A world is not dark because there is no light. It is dark because the bill got lost in the mail.

#41

#41 Each day is unique, and today is no different than any other.

#53

#53 Hope is a waking dream. Daytime television is a waking coma.

#62

#62 Cast thy bread upon the waters and it will come back a BLT

#71

#71 The only difference between fear and courage is about a .20 blood-alcohol level.

#81

#81 Everyone has talent at 25; the difficulty is to have it at 50 – Edgar Degas

#90

#90 We receive love in direct proportion to out ability to afford it.

#101

#101 Nothing is as certain as death and taxes. However, death isn’t an annual event.

Price: $10 US

Title: 101 Twisted Mantras – For The New Millennium™

By: Dr. Earnest Carpediem™

Description:

This is a collection of 101 humorous or ridiculous remarks compiled by Dr. Earnest Carpediem™ to help his students combat boredom and stupidity in the new millennium. Used in tandem with Dr. Carpediem’s Motivational Mantras you can surely achieve a new level of spirituality. The concepts and suggested activities in this book are strictly for contemplation, and are not meant to be taken internally.

Examples:

#1

#1 What really teaches a person is not experience, but getting caught at something.

#11

#11 Anyone can do his work, however hard,for one day. But I know they’re not temps.

#21

#21 If if’s and buts were raisins and nuts then we’d all have a bowl of Granola.

#31

#31 Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines.

#41

#41 Aim low, reach your goals, avoid disappointment.

#51

#51 Look both ways before crossing the street, then run like hell.

#60

#60 The fact that no one understands you doesn’t mean you’re an artist.

#71

#71 That sounds reasonable…time to up my medication.

#81

#81 Reply to everything someone says with, “That’s what you think.”

#90

#90 Sing the “Bananas in Pajamas” theme song, audibly, in public.

#100

#100 Replace your “Inbox” with a garbage can.

Price: $10 US

Title: 101 Mantras – For The New Millennium™

By: Dr. Earnest Carpediem™

Description-

This is a collection of 101 motivational or inspirational quotations compiled by Dr. Earnest Carpediem™ to help his students embrace the new millennium. The quotations range from political, to metaphysical, to theological, and cover a variety of topics, but all have been included due to their unique Mega Motivational powers!

Examples:

#1

#1 Every man is the architect of his own future .– Novalis

#11

#11 Wherever you live is your temple, if you treat it like one . – Buddha

#21

#21 Marriage is the highest mystery. – Novalis

#31

#31 What the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve. – Napoleon Hill

#41

#41 No showflake in an avalanche ever feels responsible. – Stanislaus Lezcynski

#51

#51What is true by lamplight is not always true by sunlight . – Joseph Joubert

#60

#60 Don’t be confused by surfaces; in the depths everything becomes law. – Rainer Maria Rilke

#71

#71 Every man over 40 is responsible for (the disposition of) his face. – Abe Lincoln

#81

#81 In the struggle between yourself and the world, second the world. – Franz Kafka

#90

#90 If your compassion does not include yourself, it is incomplete. – Buddha

#101

#101 All our dreams can come true – if we have the courage to pursue them. – Walt Disney

The Masters of Success book

SEVIERVILLE, TENNESSEE? Doug Dvorak, professional speaker, motivational expert, humor and creativity consultant has been selected from a nationwide search to be featured in a new book from Insight Publishing called The Masters of Success. The book features Dvorak along with best-selling authors Ken Blanchard (One Minute Manager), John Christensen (Fish! Tales), and Jack Canfield (Chicken Soup for the Soul). Each of these well known speakers and authors shares their strategies for success in frank and intimate interviews

Doug assists clients with productivity training, corporate humor and workshops, and other aspects of sales and marketing management. His clients are characterized as Fortune 1000 companies, small to medium businesses, civic organizations, service businesses, and individual investors and entrepreneurs. Doug is a certified sales trainer, management and creativity consultant and corporate humorist.

Doug holds a Bachelor of Arts degree in Business Administration and a Master of Business Administration in Marketing Management. But his sense of humor is no less refined, as he is a graduate of the Player?s Workshop of the Second City, one of the oldest and most prestigious improvisational comedy schools in the world.

Motivational Speaker, Trainer, Consultant & Author

#1 I hope and pray life isn’t one big joke, because I don’t get it.

#11 “Once the game is over, the king and the pawn go back in the same box”

#21 Alcohol–the cause of and answer to all of life’s problems! – Homer Simpson

#31 A world is not dark because there is no light. It is dark because the bill got lost in the mail.

#41 Each day is unique, and today is no different than any other.

#53 Hope is a waking dream. Daytime television is a waking coma.

#62 Cast thy bread upon the waters and it will come back a BLT

#71 The only difference between fear and courage is about a .20 blood-alcohol level.

#81 Everyone has talent at 25; the difficulty is to have it at 50 – Edgar Degas

#90 We receive love in direct proportion to out ability to afford it.

#1 What really teaches a person is not experience, but getting caught at something.

#11 Anyone can do his work, however hard,for one day. But I know they’re not temps.

#21 If if’s and buts were raisins and nuts then we’d all have a bowl of Granola.

#31 Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines.

#41 Aim low, reach your goals, avoid disappointment.

#51 Look both ways before crossing the street, then run like hell.

#60 The fact that no one understands you doesn’t mean you’re an artist.

#71 That sounds reasonable…time to up my medication.

#81 Reply to everything someone says with, “That’s what you think.”

#90 Sing the “Bananas in Pajamas” theme song, audibly, in public.

#1 Every man is the architect of his own future .– Novalis

#11 Wherever you live is your temple, if you treat it like one . – Buddha

#21 Marriage is the highest mystery. – Novalis

#31 What the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve. – Napoleon Hill

#41 No showflake in an avalanche ever feels responsible. – Stanislaus Lezcynski

#51What is true by lamplight is not always true by sunlight . – Joseph Joubert

#60 Don’t be confused by surfaces; in the depths everything becomes law. – Rainer Maria Rilke

#71 Every man over 40 is responsible for (the disposition of) his face. – Abe Lincoln

#81 In the struggle between yourself and the world, second the world. – Franz Kafka

#90 If your compassion does not include yourself, it is incomplete. – Buddha

#101 All our dreams can come true – if we have the courage to pursue them. – Walt Disney